I’m not sure if this happened to other colleagues but it happened to me often and I wonder if it’s an Roman Catholic schools thing. Read on…

I’ve blogged about Bus Duty elsewhere and so this is what happened. I was just waving a bus off and thanking their driver when a distant shout back down the path alerted me to stop the bus “Oh hold on Driver” and down the road came Liam (we’ll call him Liam because that was his name). The bus driver waited and Liam got on and I thanked the driver, waved him off BUT he didn’t leave and beckoned me on. That only means one thing, bus troubles.

“Mr Dexter please do something about that lad, he is so badly behaved on the bus”

“Oh like what?”

“Well yesterday he had a packet of polo mints which he broke into small pieces and threw around the bus at people.”

So I go on board ask a few other pupils who confirm the incident and all I can do is ask Liam to see me next day at break at the staffroom door – you know sternly, teacher look, teacher face.

If any of you are senior staff reading this you’ll know what I’m about to say very well. By the time morning break came around I had done or not completed a thousand tasks with hundreds of people. As one colleague said until you meet yourself going backwards you’ve not understood school leadership. An evening of emails, marking, preparation, a morning of assembly, cover issues, and lesson one taught  – ‘good lesson” I’d say – not sure ofsted would but then they just observed at that time they didn’t deliver 20 lessons a week and do all this !

So the bell goes for break I, like many other staff, head for coffee and the staff toilets. Just as I turn around someone says “Mr Dexter Liam at the door for you”. Do you know in all honesty I couldn’t remember what it was about. I answered the door remembered he was in some trouble ( polos and buses) and so we went into an office (doors open of course).

Me “OK Liam thank you for coming to see me. Why did I want to speak with you?” [Teacher look, teacher voice, disappointed ‘you’ve let yourself down’ eyes.]

Liam “ I know Mr Dexter, I’m very sorry.”

Me “Go on”

Liam “ Its about French isn’t it, and my behaviour with Mrs C. I really shouldn’t have spoken to her like that ….”

Me “ Mmmm thank you Liam, that’s important but actually it wasn’t about that”

Liam “ Oh is it about the incident in Biology, it wasn’t really my fault the scissors slipped, I don’t honestly know how they flew across the lab and hit Ashraf, it was an accident but I do need to apologise. Oh hang on is he ok?

Me “ Mmmm thank you Liam, that’s bad isn’t it  but actually it wasn’t about that, Ash is fine”

Liam “ Oh Sir it’s not about English homework, I just didn’t understand it and that’s why I copied off Heather, I didn’t think Mrs W actually noticed but nevertheless it was wrong.

Me “ Mmmm thank you Liam, that’s helpful to know  but actually it wasn’t…”

BELL

Break over 15 minutes up

Me quickly “ actually Liam it was about the polos on the bus”

Liam “Oh that , that’s nothing really Sir”

…..and that’s why our heads of year and form tutors got loads of detailed referrals 

I thought it was exceptional but it happened over and over. On another occasion I had to speak with a sixthformer about an incident at the drinks machine. We had a number of problems with a vending machine and made no progress in solving what was happening. So we put up and told the students about a temporary CCTV. I think Rick has been away or not paying attention when we told the students and day one a colleague sent me a video clip of Rick not just shaking the machine but obtaining three drinks and then selling two onwards. 

Once again I called Rick to the office and asked him if he knew why I wanted a word

• Is it all my lates?
• Is it all the referrals from my Business Studies teacher?
• Was it because I skived off Maths?
• Is it my incomplete UCAS form with only a few days left to the deadline?

The great thing here was me nodding and just waiting. [teacher eyes, teacher expressions, teacher timing.]

• Oh Sir has someone complained about my lengthy excuses for not meeting deadlines?
• Oh No don’t tell me you are kicking me out ( We didn’t really do that!!)

That’s escalation for you and again another lengthy set of confessions to sort. He was all the more mortified when I showed the video and just as he reverted to character – ‘are you sure that’s me Mr Dexter?’

My dear teacher friends you remember raising that eyebrow using that voice and condemning those actions if not the student and many of you do so thousands of times to great effect. Thank you